Dancing Buttacupp

A dear friend told me that some people lack respect for the Kelantanese people (the men in general) because “women are the breadwinners”. That is the first time I have come across such a comment. The conclusion was arrived after the observer saw more women working at the Kelantan markets relative to men. Fair enough.

When I visited Kelantan and dropped by their markets, I could not agree more that a large portion of the sellers are women. Women were busy promoting their goods, and managing their stalls equally well as their male counterparts. Always cheerful and obliging, the market place was a hive of activity.

From where I stood, women are given the autonomy to choose: they can either stay at home and tend to family and household matters only, or they can also tend to the family and economic well-being by contributing the family’s purse strings. Unlike other societies or countries, women are expected to just stay at home. While the men work the fields or do their carpentry, the Kelantanese women manage the side-business in the market place to earn extra income for the family. If anything were to happen to the husband, at least the women would have additional skills to become the main breadwinners. The role of women is acknowledged by allowing them more freedom to contribute to their religion, family, society and state.

The glass seems to be half full in the Kelantan market place for women. Thankfully in Malaysia, many women have the ability to choose…and this is not specific toKelantan only.

This particular Saturday, a good friend and I travelled to Titiwangsa in search of an orphanage and single-mother center. We came with cash donations from many gracious individuals, and wanted to visit the center.

We stayed there for over 2 hours, and watched so many kind-hearted people come and go, donating clothes and monetary funds. My friend and I walked around the compund talking to the facilitators, and inspected the house. We were shocked that a small place housed 60 children and several single-mothers.

We met the children, who ranged from 17 years to 15-day-old babies. I played "futsal" with them with a small red plastic tennis-ball because they didn’t have a proper football. Then, my friend and I read to some of them because some never went to school but was very interested in books. We spoke to around 10 children, asked them of their background, hobbies, friends, etc. A heartbreaking experience was hearing them ask their guardian when can they go home, and listening to a mentally-challenged girl sing the Titanic song "My Heart Will Go On". We were told that she "lost it" when her mother passed away as she could not accept her mother’s death. I could honestly say we were close to tears (susah sangat nak mengaku!).

What we realized was, even though the mentally challenged girl was a sad case, it is even sadder for those who are "normal" as they have feelings, & are aware of their surroundings. They have the every day struggle to remain alive, happy and successfull, yet never ever having the love of their biological parents or siblings. They looked really happy when we took interest in their lives, when we read, played and joked with them.  They didn’t have anything, not even the clothes on their back, but they ahd much to smile about. The children don’t really need material things, what they needed was love, encouragement, and motivation. Leaving was most painful, but we vowed to return with books, more quality time and perhaps more volunteers.

After that, I visited a good old friend from Djibouti who’s father passed away a few days back. I had iftar with her and friends. She insisted on me staying as she wanted to prepare a special Djiboutian dinner. My, I was so full because her cooking was sooo good! Believe me, it was a conspiracy to fatten me up! Good times it was catching up.

Then I met up with close partner in crime. It has been so long even though we stray in the same state. I found out by accident unpleasant news abt her, and could not help but sympathise. I take no sides in this matter, but I know nobody deserves to go through such pain as I did. It’s funny, most of my closest friends are having the same trouble…hopefully things will be better for us all. I am so amazed at how calm and collected she is, and how she has grown in wisdom.  All the power to you.

Finally before leaving for home, met up with a PD pal at Masjid Jamek for a hug (long-time overdue) and Eid greeting.

A long day it was, but at least a fulfilling one.

-Asma wan signing off-

Lemme tell you that this Ramadhan has been full of adventures and lessons.

LESS IFTAR, MORE SAHUR

Normally I would initiate an iftar gethering among friends, but since living far away from KL, that has proved to be quite a challenge and never really materialize. Furthermore, it is peak period for most of us. More iftar have been hosted by friends in the Negeri Sembilan area, from PD-Senawang. My bachelor friends and I are more than happy to accept the invitation to feast on good 0l’ home cooked meals. The funny thing is, in KL, instead of meeting up with friends for iftar, I have been having pre-dawn breakfast with them. Yes, to those individuals that get late night calls from me who needed a place to crash, err…Kepong and Kg Baru pals…and to those whom I jsut met and yet offered me their homes to stay in…

TERIMA KASIH

The Death of my Touch & Go

On one occasion where I was invited for iftar, I took a ticket from the toll booth (somehow I forgot I had a T&G card). After driving for quite some time, I approached another toll booth. Swiped my T&G and the bar wouldn’t budge, and the meter read : under RM 1. Hmm…then I had to back up cos there was this other car behind us who kept glaring. After speaking to the toll attendant did I realize that I had used my T&G card when I was supposed to go to the "Tunai" booth and pay cash. The remedy: I have to go to the place where I purchased the card and get it fixed ! Darn. That’s all the way in Subang Jaya. For now, my T&G is useless. It has RM30+ balance but reads RM-1. Grreat.

Q3 Reporting Gone Wrong

I had to spend the whole week in KL even my weekends to prepare for our first Q3 closing & reporting using a new global ERP/SAP system. Haha. Normally we use the weekends to troubleshoot any potential problems we might face. Unfortunately, due to system errors and slowdowns, our weekend schedule had to be delayed to a working week. That gives us minimal time to play with. Worse, we had so many system problems, but our parent company would not extend the deadlines. It came to a point where I had to submit 3 reports before midnight on the same day! That week was soooo challenging as I came home a-knocking at my pal’s place in Kepong (she was warned, thank God) around 1am everday and left her house as early as 6.15am (woke up at 5am). The turning point was when my body and mind could no longer take the exhaustion. I nearly fainted from lack of sleep. Not only that, I had a Budget Challenge session to facilitate the very next day. Thankfully, my soon-to-be ex-boss told me to postpone the Budget Challenge due to the delay. Amidst the chaos, I had 3 different auditors from PwC, EY and KPMG chasing after me. Oh well. We all have to do our jobs.

Getting Lost in KL

Got lost driving around in the Klang valley area a few times.

Charity-drive

What was supposed to be a normal forward about appreciating the underpriviledged and less fortunate, brought out an expected outcome. Some friends at my Damansara HQ actually collected funds in a few days totalling to RM 138. A friend also wanted to bring some cheer to others by inviting me to visit an orphanage. I was ecstatic and happy at how caring Malaysians are.

Breaking My Ramadhan Rule

Remember I wanted to go home latest by 6pm? Well, that only happened twice. For the rest of the month, I have been breaking fast in the office, well, at least 80% of the time. Usually on fridays i’d run off to break with colleagues outside, then returning to the office. Or, wld just order in. This month was not suitable to implement this rule, but at least the intention was there. Challenges came in the form of late meetings (even at 5.30 and 6pm!) and of course submission deadlines.

Better luck next year!

Falling Sick in Ramadhan

I had to buy Strepsils Vit C at the nearest 7-11 in Bandaraya Damansara and consumed at least 3 a day to prevent from falling seriously ill. I also had to check whether my friends have salt for me to gargle. A general comment I received prior to falling ill , " You look like your face just got ran over by a truck"…

Gee, thanks. I think. And no, I didn’t get an MC nor go to the clinic. But soon after the submission I hurried home…to SLEEP! Nikmatnya.

Expired Road-Tax

I’m not sure why but I always seem to have a problem with my road tax. Ok, it’s not the road tax. Everytime I decide to check when my road tax is due for a renewal, that day happens to be the day it expires. Tough. I cld honestly recall it was Oct 23rd, but no, the sticker states clearly Oct 13th 06, which coincidentally is Friday the 13th. Haha. Not one to believe in this nonsense, it was definitely ironic. Good one.

Missing Specs

This is tragic. There was this one week where I travelled in-out of KL and the peninsular. One day, I realized I didn’t have my glasses. What happened? I must’ve left it at one of the hotels. Darn!

That’s all for now.

-Asma wan signing off-